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[peachfuzz]

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[notvaljean]

Connie
Jean titan
no eat all food

[peachfuzz]

yes eat all food. wouldn't want it to go bad, right. I mean, what? what are we talking about?

[notvaljean]

NO EAT ALL FOOD
Marco hungry
you no eat

[peachfuzz]

ohhh dude here I go. I'm eating all the bacon. I'm doing it RIGHT NOW.

[notvaljean]

Connie bad
Jean pick up
put high
so no eat food

[peachfuzz]

wrong. connie AWESOME. and no way, don't come near me with your titan hands, man!!

[lordofthefries]

connie what's the clap?

[The things she learns here, man.]

[peachfuzz]

I dunno. is it anything like a high five?

[lordofthefries]

i don't think so. this boy said condoms stop you from getting it but don't you want applause?

[peachfuzz]

ohhh!! then it's probably a sex thing. someone told me condoms stop bad things that come with sex. like babies and weird itches.

and does anyone really want applause following that? or in the middle? that sounds kinda awkward Sasha.

[lordofthefries]

oh like that rash that one girl in training camp talked about. she said it burned when she peed. i should bring some condoms back for her.

i don't know. i don't know what they do during it. should i have applauded jean?

1/2

[peachfuzz]

I still don't think we can take stuff back with us but I guess if you can she'll appreciate it. . .

jk 2/4

[peachfuzz]

wait, what?

[peachfuzz]

WHAT

DID YOU HAVE SEX WITH JEAN?????

» text

[lordofthefries]

i'm sorry i bit you and did all that stuff and if you're mad at me, i'll understand. i'd be mad at me for acting like an idiot. you can have all the cakes under my bed in the shoeboxes.

you don't have to answer this is you don't want to.

1/2

[peachfuzz]

i'm not mad at you

why would i be? i wasn't thinking about it at the time, but there was some weird chip thing going on again. and that's not your fault, sasha.

[peachfuzz]

but since you offered i'm totally taking one of those cakes. because they're cake and cake is delicious.

[lordofthefries]

because i bit you again like i was a dog and left marks. then i said really weird stuff and even if it was because of the chip, it's stuff i said and did. i even hit jean because of it and that's not right.

you can really have all of them. i paid jean for the microwave i broke, but i never broke anything of yours and the cake is the only thing i have to give to you.

[peachfuzz]

the marks aren't actually so bad, y'know. i mean yeah they look bad, but they're not actually. . .

and you're not talking me out of taking only one.

but you hit jean?? holy shit. i kinda wish i could have seen that cause i can hardly believe it.

[lordofthefries]

don't they hurt? i don't get it. i remember you getting--nevermind.

i'm going to dump them all on your bed, connie. take them.

we had a fight about the kitchen and i tackled him. eren is happy i did it, but it was stupid. that's why i haven't been home.

[notvaljean]

hey baldie
call Sasha and tell her you're not mad at her

[peachfuzz]

i already told her i wasn't! and i'm still not. why would i be mad at her?

[notvaljean]

okay, okay!
i don't know!
but i guess she thinks we're mad at her and hate her or something

so be extra nice to her
i have a threesome riding on this

[peachfuzz]

she thought i was mad because
you know.
she's the one who got all up on my neck and everything.

[ and anyone who's seen connie since it happened couldn't have possibly missed the numerous hickeys she'd left behind. ]

a threesome? what the hell, jean!! u REALLY have too much game.

[notvaljean]

i figured
she really got you good
wear them with pride, bro

yeah, i've got game
the kind that comes with being a giant slut who fixes all problems with sex

[Ahaha... ha. Hilarious.]